The Beer Rabbit
  by
F1/C-SS Dave Hussey 

It was in Panama, so it had to be my first (and best) boat Parche SS384 since I didn't ride the Sea Leopard past Key West. The Parche was and is a very close knit bunch. 

On a warm dull evening at the dock refueling in Panama, some of the off duty crew decided to check out the beer situation. Some of you might remember the humungous circus tent with marine guards posted at the perimeters, but they sold beer in gallon jugs to be consumed on the premises. 

We worked on the first jug while plotting a strategy for getting a few back to the dock for the duty crew. There were twelve of us in the gang and we planned two jugs to the man. Some should make it to the dock. I was designated to be the rabbit. On signal. we split in designated directions The "rabbit" goes last as bait but only needed to be fast enough to outrun a Marine with a rifle. I stuck my thumbs in the bottle neck as stoppers and waited for crew to clear the tent lights and I let out a yowl and blew the scene. 

I was flat out before hitting the first tent rope staked about 10 feet from the tent wall. I did a full forward 360 but the jugs didn't. I dislocated both thumbs without spilling a drop. When I got to the dock the party had already begun, but they couldn't get the jugs off my thumbs nor could I get a belt to ease the pain. We got the expected smart a---d suggestions on how to save my jugs, the most generous of which was, in consideration of my being right handed, only severing my left thumb. 

I wish I believed the applied ice was to reduce the swelling as much as it was to chill the warm beer but it worked, my thumbs were freed but until we got to Pearl, I couldn't hold a mug without using two hands.


If you have any comments for the author, he can be reached at parche1@seabrook.net 

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