Ode to the Submariner

by Tim Butterfield

Take her Deep, Take her Low
May you never have to Emergency Blow

Out in the Ocean's Deep
Without even a Peep

You track both Man Made and natural things
Without even emitting a ping

Your shaft and screw run around
And run others into the ground

Your weapons are harnessed in racks
Just waiting for the word to target their tracks

Back during the Cold War
We tracked the enemy both near and far

The skimmers all wonder
How they could make such a blunder
When they think they see a periscope's glare
But all it is a submariner's Green Flare
The submariner outfoxed them again
And showed them who owns the Ocean's Great Den

We sometimes take Seals
And feed them a great meal
Then off they go
To put on their own show

The Boomers patrol out there
In places no one else knows where
Silent and Deadly
But Smooth and Stealthy

When submariners return to port
Coming from places of every sort
They go from bar to bar
Just to see how much and how far
And how many and how much
They can outdo one another

In this and that way
So they can tell all on the boat
That they beat their sub brother

They also make new friends
Both yonder and here

Though they sometimes get wild and go bare
Are up until the crack of dawn or beyond
They are all quite fond
Of the sex that is so fair
Some people call it crazy
But never call a Submariner lazy
'cause come what will and what may
He knows how to make the enemy pay!

The Quartermaster plots our course
Through Nav Hazards both many and few
He keeps his calm even through ORSE
And we always arrive inport ahead or when we are due

The MS' forever slave to get us our grub
Which is served with a flare by an FSA nub

The A-Gangers are always busy
Keeping their systems fixed so we get underway
Though their workload would make the rest of us dizzy
To them it's just another part of the day

The Radioman makes sure we get our e-mail
Through State 5 seas, hurricanes, and tsunamis, without fail
They also ensure we receive all pertinent news
Like Sports, news, and the occasional birth news

The nukes back aft work as a team
So efficiently with a full head of steam
That we keep getting the Engineering "E"
For all to know and others to see

The IC men and NavETs work as a group
To ensure we never get out of the loop
From navigation and CAMS to monitoring and RADAR
They also ensure we pull in safe whether near or far

The Store Keepers
Are always the keepers
Keeping us up and running
So we have more time for funning

The Sonar Techs
Try to prevent all the wrecks
Listening for ships
Or the big bios blips

The FTs plot all our contacts
So none end up jumping on our back
The Torpedomen can't wait for the day
When the weapons come out of their tray
And go for their targets out in the Great Way

The JOs are always in the Wardroom training
With knowledge they are a'gaining
Will help them in quals to join the halls
Of the qualified members of the Submariners band
Our Engineer owns the Reactor Plant
With all the power for the ship
To go at a mighty good clip

The smokers complain
Because they have only one lane
With which to enjoy
The sweet taste of nicotine

Out at sea we run out of milk, fresh fruit, and juice
Until we pull in and get us some more

The COB and XO love to make us clean
But they don't do it just to be mean
For all the cleaning keeps dirt and dust out of machines
And also helps the crew from getting migraines

The Captain looks out for us one and all
And ensures we all have time with our families in the Fall.

We run silent, we run deep
We may get little sleep
But our pride runs just as deep
But in the end it is all worth it
When those we protect tell us how proud they are
Of the way that we did it

[This was written while on deployment onboard the USS Houston in 2000 when I was an ET1(SS) - Tim]